20 August 2007, Day One
Rock Harbor
I am here. Many emotions run through me, primarily fear. I’ve only cried once; it is the children. I was talking to a man waiting for the Queen with his daughter, about 14 years old, and two sons, maybe 10 and 12 years old. They have finished a backpacking trip. I explain something to them that, in this moment, they know better than me: how wonderful it is to be on the Island with children. And also how I miss mine, now grown and on their own, the sadness I feel to be here without Geneva.
My back is tender from lifting my boat twice today, to and part way from the ferry. I am proud to carry it on my shoulder and want to look strong. I reject Don Watson's offer to help until he says "Save your back."
Rock Harbor is quiet. It is late in the season. Gas prices keep motor boats on a distant shore. That’s a good thing, but the feeling here is eerie. The sky is blue through a light layer of clouds. Again I wonder if the season is too late for me.
Everyone arriving from the ferry listens to a short lecture on doing our part to keep this Island wild. Our ranger today is Karena. On an Island dominated by youthful testosterone Karena’s graying hair lifts my spirits. When I step into the Visitor’s Center to pick up the magic paper in a zip-lock plastic bag, that will claim my space on the island for the next 21 days, Ranger Karena checks me in. “How many people in your party?”
“One.”
“Solo-it’s the only way to really get to know the Island.” A thousand times during the next 21 days, times of both elation and self-doubt, I am going to replay these three sentences through my mind. I am not crazy for being here alone.
2 comments:
I think I'm glad you went alone. Sure it made me nervous but I completely understand what it means to want to be alone. One of my favorite days on the island last time was the day Ava and I split up and I got to hike the ridges solo and you know how much I love and cherish Ava's company. Still...there is something to be said for solitude. I can't imagine how beautiful to wake up and get to decide exactly what you want to do. There is something awesome about the responsibility and freedom of being solo.
Lauren,
I just finished reading the entire beautifully-written account of your journey. Thank you for sharing the details of your long trip and your thoughts along the way.
I appreciate the desire to travel alone, marching to the beat of your own drum without worrying whether your travelling companion feels you might be spending too much time taking it all in.
My favorite sentence was this one:
"Here my movement will be shaped by wind and wave, by rock and desire." Wonderful.
-Nina
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